Leaders run into problems when they see conflict as something to be avoided. In this Leadership Moment, Daniel challenges you to view conflict as an opportunity to grow and to learn, both for you and the other person involved.
Posts Tagged ‘Conflict’
Leadership Moment: Attacking Conflict
Monday, September 12th, 2011Stop Using Email!
Friday, April 15th, 2011Over the years I have spent a great deal of time working with leaders on communication challenges stemming from the improper use of email.
I don’t think it is ever a wise idea to work through conflicts and challenges via email. We can’t read tone and too often we take liberties behind the keyboard that we would not take if we were face-to-face or on the phone.
Can You Feel It?
Wednesday, July 21st, 2010
I had a coaching session last week with a client who owns a great company here in the Northwest. Like many business leaders, his natural behavioral style is on the dominant side, which means he is a take-charge kind of guy. For those of you familiar with the DISC behavioral language, he is a High D.
I know this type very, very well.
Studies have shown that there is a correlating emotion for each behavioral style which emerges when that person is frustrated or challenged. For a High D, the emotion is anger.
In this session, my client shared that he feels some very real physical changes when he is being challenged or threatened. What he experienced has everything to do with Emotional Intelligence, or EQ.
Don’t Ever Take the Easy Way Out
Tuesday, June 8th, 2010Let me put “the easy way out” in the proper context.
Sometimes we may use email or texting to deliver bad news or disappointment. We take the “easy way out” when we avoid sitting down face to face to work through the conflict.
Another way we avoid conflict is by allowing someone to deliver a difficult message for us, or asking them to act as our peacemaker in a hostile situation. In most cases, we could have prevented the conflict from getting to this stage if we had just taken the initiative to deal with it up front in a caring and truthful way.
Once we send someone else in to do our battle, the odds of reconciliation diminish greatly.
Conflict: Friend or Foe?
Tuesday, April 20th, 2010
This post is dedicated to my friend Patrick Lencioni. His fantastic model for teamwork in his bestselling book The Five Dysfunctions of a Team helped me to better understand the value of conflict. I strongly suggest you read this book.
In The Five Dysfunctions, Patrick says that many teams struggle with the fear of conflict. They do not understand that conflict in the pursuit of truth and improvement is a good thing. They believe it to be mean and bad, instead of loving and beneficial. This struggle exists not only in the workplace, but also in marriages and other close relationships.
If people are not equipped to engage in healthy conflict, then they either fight in unhealthy ways or they hold back their feelings and impede the growth of those around them.
