Don’t Ever Take the Easy Way Out
Let me put “the easy way out” in the proper context.
Sometimes we may use email or texting to deliver bad news or disappointment. We take the “easy way out” when we avoid sitting down face to face to work through the conflict.
Another way we avoid conflict is by allowing someone to deliver a difficult message for us, or asking them to act as our peacemaker in a hostile situation. In most cases, we could have prevented the conflict from getting to this stage if we had just taken the initiative to deal with it up front in a caring and truthful way.
Once we send someone else in to do our battle, the odds of reconciliation diminish greatly.
Last week, I was joined by four other Building Champions coaches as we walked a group of clients through a performance model on “Health.” We targeted four aspects of health – emotional, physical, relational, and professional — with the goal of helping them to identify gaps and best practices for each. These four aspects are all inextricably linked — if we take a hit in one of the four, eventually the other three will suffer.
Coach James Allison focused on Relational Health. He said that if we are to protect, improve, and maintain deep and trusting relationships at home and at work, we must master the skill of conflict resolution.
He challenged us to be “Care Fronters,” meaning that we should care as much about the relationship as we do the issue. For the sake of the relationship, we must be willing invest the time to meet with those we have conflict with in order to pursue resolution. No texting or emailing or delegating when it comes to bad news or disappointment.
Don’t ever take “the easy way out.” It will only lead to more conflict in the future.
Personally, I wish I had heard James speak (or read my own blog post) years ago. I know I could have possibly avoided an escalating conflict that I experienced in the past few weeks.
Here’s to never taking the easy way out! The alternative is often a tough, pride-swallowing road…but it leads to stronger relationships.
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Tags: Conflict, Health, Relationships, The Masters' Coach
As a high school teacher, I am learning to confront conflict quickly, even if it means I have to demand that a student leaves my class. Fortunately, my school has an efficient discipline system set up, so I am backed by my administration. Most of the time, I end with better relationships with students that I discipline. Thanks for sharing!
My pleasure Patricia. Thanks for adding to this topic!